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On October 11th national coming out day gives thousands of members of the GLBTQ community a chance to tell their friends, family, and mostly themselves that they are part of this community. It’s not a time for (ready for a laugh?) for recruitment for new members. The secret handshake is not plastered all over a secret website and there is no hidden door that will convert you once you walk in. This is about a community banding together to help support others through a difficult process. The truth is that this day is set aside to offer you additional support if you are facing issues that could make coming out more difficult for you.

National coming out day is also about celebrating who you are and who you are growing into. It’s about loving yourself for who you are and learning that you are in control over your own happiness. It is most definitely about refusing to live the life of a lie and reaching out toward the gay community that is ready to offer you acceptance and support.

There are thousands of people who are on the brink of changing their lives by refusing to give the power of their own happiness and comfort over to those who choose to judge them. You may very well be gay or you might just be questioning your sexual identity. This doesn’t mean that you have to hand over your life for judgment to those around you.

Instead, national coming out day gives you a milestone to consider. If you are getting sick of denying the truth to yourself, you might find it helpful to have a calendar date that signifies others who will also be coming out. This is a day when you will find that help lines and support groups are more readily available, especially as the day becomes more recognized.

There is no reason that you have to hide behind a façade any longer. Every time you make an excuse, avoid the truth, or have to work exceptionally hard to make sure your family never finds out about your lover you are telling yourself that there is something wrong with you. National coming out day is a day to embrace who you are, learn a little something about your community, and of course learn to love and accept yourself for the lifestyle that fits you.

Hiding in the closet is where we all start. When we step out for the first time we are all afraid and we are all worried about what other people might think or do in response to us. However, hiding in the closet also gives other people control over our own happiness. If you would be happier with someone of the same gender, your denial isn’t about making you happy.

National coming out day is set aside to help you learn how to celebrate your own unique diversity. Just as we celebrate the diversity of ethnic cultures, we can celebrate the diversity that the GLBTQ community offers the world. As times change, as they are quite rapidly, we are going to see more days dedicated to helping those who are confused, scared, or filled with questions learn how to open up to themselves.